Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

This section was setup in August 2018 in order to move the existing related discussions from other sections into this new section to group them together, and separate from the other CH-related topics.

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Peele94
2nd Former
Posts: 15
Joined: Sat Sep 27, 2014 11:12 pm
Real Name: Duncan Forbes

Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Peele94 »

Hi and Happy New Year,
I’m really pleased to announce that we are planning a 2nd self help group (SHG) to start in February. The first SHG went really well, beyond expectations, and there are some people who’d like to repeat the group, and others who couldn’t join the first time, but would like to now.

Participants said that the last one massively helped them particularly in terms of finding a group that understood both CH and abuse, and of not feeling so alone. The psycho-education on the course also helped people to understand how their body and mind responded to the abuse.

The group is 12 x 90min online sessions (roughly once a week, but with roughly once a month there being time off to do your own self-care and reflections on what you’ve learned). At each session, we do some psycho-education on how abuse affects our mind, body, voice, relationships and power, and then a Q&A and time for sharing.

The group will be facilitated by a female Old Blue who is a qualified counsellor and myself (I am presently a trainee counsellor). The group is free, and is not actual group therapy, although it should be therapeutic.

This self-help group is open to Old Blue survivors of all sexes, genders, sexualities, of all beliefs and none; and it will be a safe non-judgmental place for everyone. To ensure it is a healthy safe space, we do have a screening process.

If you'd like more information, or would like to chat to me about it, please go to my website https://forsurvivors.co.uk/ob-survivors/

Best Wishes
Duncan Forbes (CH 87-94)
Janey Jam-Jar
GE (Great Erasmus)
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Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2018 11:56 am
Real Name: Catherine/CJ
Location: Devon

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Janey Jam-Jar »

Thanks Duncan for sharing this information.

I've had a lot of individual therapy (still ongoing), and done my own counsellor training. Both very worthwhile in their different ways. The self-help group last year has been a revelation in communication and sharing with other OBs who experienced abuses, and for the speed at which the therapeutic process affected me and began to shift some of what felt like concreted positions.

I'm really pleased to be co-facilitating the next group with Duncan. And I'm excited to welcome new participants of all ages into the next stage of their healing.

Catherine Standing (Cooper)
Col A and 1s 1983-90
Peele94
2nd Former
Posts: 15
Joined: Sat Sep 27, 2014 11:12 pm
Real Name: Duncan Forbes

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Peele94 »

I feel so excited and privileged that we are about to start this. So many of us suffered alone for years. I hope this next group is a healing experience for all.
rjscratton
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Joined: Mon Feb 26, 2024 8:52 pm
Real Name: Reuben Scratton

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by rjscratton »

I'd like to apologise to anyone affected when I doubted the news re. Dobbie a few years ago.

Unlike most teachers from my CH time (1982-1989) I got on particularly well with Dobbie, and even stayed overnight at his house at least once, and I simply could not believe the accusations. I expressed unwarranted scepticism about the accusations online, believing them to be basically post-Savile hysteria.

For that, I am most deeply sorry.
Kiff
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Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2018 10:39 am
Real Name: Kiff

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Kiff »

Fair play to you.

What changed your mind?
Hidden
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Joined: Tue Apr 30, 2024 8:37 am
Real Name: Also Hidden

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Hidden »

Peele94 wrote: Thu Feb 15, 2024 8:35 pm I feel so excited and privileged that we are about to start this. So many of us suffered alone for years. I hope this next group is a healing experience for all.
Are you going to run this again? I am too late for this round, alas, but would definitely be interested next time you set up a group.
Peele94
2nd Former
Posts: 15
Joined: Sat Sep 27, 2014 11:12 pm
Real Name: Duncan Forbes

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Peele94 »

Hi, we do hope we can run more of these groups. Please contact me on the email address at the bottom of my website.
https://forsurvivors.co.uk/ob-survivors/
Hidden
2nd Former
Posts: 3
Joined: Tue Apr 30, 2024 8:37 am
Real Name: Also Hidden

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Hidden »

Thanks for the reply, Duncan. I’ve emailed you.
Janey Jam-Jar
GE (Great Erasmus)
Posts: 102
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2018 11:56 am
Real Name: Catherine/CJ
Location: Devon

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Janey Jam-Jar »

Hidden wrote: Tue Apr 30, 2024 10:30 am
Peele94 wrote: Thu Feb 15, 2024 8:35 pm I feel so excited and privileged that we are about to start this. So many of us suffered alone for years. I hope this next group is a healing experience for all.
Are you going to run this again? I am too late for this round, alas, but would definitely be interested next time you set up a group.
Jumping on this reply as I co-facilitate the support groups with Duncan. Hidden, Duncan's website is really useful. Do leave your details on the form and we will be in touch when we run the next group.
Warm wishes, Catherine
Janey Jam-Jar
GE (Great Erasmus)
Posts: 102
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2018 11:56 am
Real Name: Catherine/CJ
Location: Devon

Re: Self Help Group for Survivors of Abuse at CH

Post by Janey Jam-Jar »

rjscratton wrote: Wed Mar 20, 2024 1:07 pm I'd like to apologise to anyone affected when I doubted the news re. Dobbie a few years ago.

Unlike most teachers from my CH time (1982-1989) I got on particularly well with Dobbie, and even stayed overnight at his house at least once, and I simply could not believe the accusations. I expressed unwarranted scepticism about the accusations online, believing them to be basically post-Savile hysteria.

For that, I am most deeply sorry.
Thank you for acknowledging your position on this. Survivors being disbelieved is a double burden to carry. Predators don't only groom their victims, they also groom and manipulate 'supporters'.
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