Matron memories

[Ajarn Philip]

I haven't been able to kneel for years. I can do the "ever-so-'umble" bit if required, so give with the details!

I'm trying to conjure up an image of Maggie with head bowed, hands rubbing together, saying "Please Mister, if you could see yer way clear to givin' us a little snippet or two, I'd be most externally grateful..." It's not forming!

[J.R.]

House-maids were rarely likely to incite adolescent lusts. Mostly they were Sicilian, short, moutachioed and fat. We did have a German au pair in Thornton once, who aroused more interest.

This one was very different from your description. She was a slightly smaller version of Sophia Loren, and boy, did she knew it !

[NEILL THE NOTORIOUS]

Yes JR ------ AND ---- AND ----?

[J.R.]

Well - I didn't, but would have done, given just half a chance !

[midget]

Philip, if it is any help in your image forming, on my bus pass photo I look like John Prescott's ugly sister!

[Barnes Mum]

Are you called 'Matron' by the girls?

I dread to ask,... just in case modern CH has gone to Christian names for the staff.

John

Yes, they still call us Matron. This is a bit embarassing if you happen to bump into a pupil out of school and without thinking they shout "Hello Matron!"

[CHAZ]

One imagines imagies of Hattie Jacques or Jakes in those Carry On films when she was a spectacular matron!

[Barnes Mum]

I hate to disappoint you, but I look nothing like Hattie Jacques!

[CHAZ]

I hate to disappoint you, but I look nothing like Hattie Jacques!

OOOOOOOH you are orrrrfulllll! (Kenneth W.)!

[Barnes Mum]

[Ajarn Philip]

I can't remember the name of the matron or her assistant at Maine A around 1969-70. Matron was a tough elderly little (Irish?) lady who oozed authority. Her assistant was an English Rose; blonde, beautiful, soft and sweet. She oozed something, but it wasn't authority. An embarrassing examination of my nether regions following an unfortunate encounter with a cricket ball came a little too early for me to truly appreciate, but the memory lingers on.

Now, it's entirely possible that that same lingering memory may have been enhanced by time, so if any of my Ma. A contemporaries remember her differently, please keep it to yourselves; I don't need any more illusions shattered...

(Incidentally, the diagnosis was mild bruising, no permanent damage and don't forget your box next time!)

Sorry, Barnes Mum, but you started this thread...

[Ajarn Philip]

Oh, and by the way, that wasn't what I was referring to earlier!

[lonelymom]

Sorry, Barnes Mum, but you started this thread...

And I'm sure posts like that make her extremely grateful she works in a girl's house!

[lonelymom]

Oh, and by the way, that wasn't what I was referring to earlier!

Oh yes, you still haven't told us the juicy gossip, have you? We did beg, but if you need more here goes - please please please tell us more

[lonelymom]

By the way Philip, have I told you that you are my bestest, most favouritist person on this forum?