Non-members, non-posting members and general coyness

[sejintenej]

Apologies if I worried you!

[Jeeves]

I have met a few members from the forum. One example I was pleasantly surprised and the other meeting was frankly disappointing as their personality was nothing like their forum character.

However, back onto topic... I get the feeling that new posters/members may feel isolated by the clique of regular posters, not that this bothers me too much. I do not post regularly as very few topics take my interest, or I feel that I do not have anything to contribute to them. On the other hand, I don't mind reading these topics. I also do not want to get involved with the Hertford related articles as there seems to be a strong bitterness that the school no longer exists (not that I have anything against the people involved).

It does appear that fewer new and interesting topics exist and Mallett's Mallet appears to be the only regular contribution. Things fizzle out, the forum is no longer a novelty...

[Ajarn Philip]

Before the sh1t hits the fan (as I'm sure James realises it will), I'd like to say that Jeeves is almost certainly one of those I've included in the number of members keeping the forum going.

I think his comments about Hertford were more than a tad harsh. One of the things I've enjoyed about this forum is finding out what life was like at Hertford and how life has changed at Horsham since the merger.

But I think this an age thing as much as anything. I'm looking back from the age of 50 at my adolescent years, having been pretty much out of touch for a long time, and I'm loving it. Would I have joined this forum had it existed in the year or two after I left? Can't say for sure, and certainly can't say I'd have contributed much, or stuck with it for very long. This is not a thought that had occurred to me before James' posting.

To his last points I'd say that the forum is still a bit of a novelty to me after just 6 weeks or so, but I doubt I'll continue posting at the same rate indefinitely. I also doubt I'll stop contributing in some way from time to time (as he hasn't). Many threads die a natural death, some are "resurrected" and still get a new response and maybe some new angles/ideas, and some questions (like this one apparently) are asked more than once at different times by newly joining members, which surely speaks for itself.

I'm new to the internet forum, but I've been thinking about it. I'd suggest it's a bit like a club meeting in a pub; much general jocularity, many separate conversations, the occasional serious topic that engages everyone, and every now and again a spat between 2 or 3 members that draws attention. Some, like me, will talk too much, some will keep their counsel and speak when they feel a need, some will lack confidence and rarely utter a word. Some will irritate, others will try to pour oil, etc - I'm sure you get the general picture.

I suppose my general (badly made) point is that if this appears to be a bunch of middle-aged old farts looking back on ancient history, it's never going to be what most of us probably want it to be. So, if for no other reason than bringing me to that most unprofound conclusion, "Thank you, Jeeves."

[Jeeves]

I think his comments about Hertford were more than a tad harsh. One of the things I've enjoyed about this forum is finding out what life was like at Hertford and how life has changed at Horsham since the merger.

This has possibly been misconstrued as harsh. I am interested in what life was like at Hertford, the merger and the present. But I am not interested in people moaning about the non-existance of the Hertford school. Nostalgia can be great, bitterness isn't. To reiterate, I am only stating the reasons why I rarely contribute.

[englishangel]

Before the sh1t hits the fan (as I'm sure James realises it will), I'd like to say that Jeeves is almost certainly one of those I've included in the number of members keeping the forum going.

I think his comments about Hertford were more than a tad harsh. One of the things I've enjoyed about this forum is finding out what life was like at Hertford and how life has changed at Horsham since the merger.

But I think this an age thing as much as anything. I'm looking back from the age of 50 at my adolescent years, having been pretty much out of touch for a long time, and I'm loving it. Would I have joined this forum had it existed in the year or two after I left? Can't say for sure, and certainly can't say I'd have contributed much, or stuck with it for very long. This is not a thought that had occurred to me before James' posting.

To his last points I'd say that the forum is still a bit of a novelty to me after just 6 weeks or so, but I doubt I'll continue posting at the same rate indefinitely. I also doubt I'll stop contributing in some way from time to time (as he hasn't). Many threads die a natural death, some are "resurrected" and still get a new response and maybe some new angles/ideas, and some questions (like this one apparently) are asked more than once at different times by newly joining members, which surely speaks for itself.

I'm new to the internet forum, but I've been thinking about it. I'd suggest it's a bit like a club meeting in a pub; much general jocularity, many separate conversations, the occasional serious topic that engages everyone, and every now and again a spat between 2 or 3 members that draws attention. Some, like me, will talk too much, some will keep their counsel and speak when they feel a need, some will lack confidence and rarely utter a word. Some will irritate, others will try to pour oil, etc - I'm sure you get the general picture.

I suppose my general (badly made) point is that if this appears to be a bunch of middle-aged old farts looking back on ancient history, it's never going to be what most of us probably want it to be. So, if for no other reason than bringing me to that most unprofound conclusion, "Thank you, Jeeves."

I have to agree, . I don't think we regret that Hertford closed, I think we regret the amalgamation didn't take place when our hormones were raging. I joined the froum when I was 'between jobs' and got hooked but I know my contributions have dropped off and I expect they will drop off further. (the third most prolific poster says).

[Katharine]

I think his comments about Hertford were more than a tad harsh. One of the things I've enjoyed about this forum is finding out what life was like at Hertford and how life has changed at Horsham since the merger.

This has possibly been misconstrued as harsh. I am interested in what life was like at Hertford, the merger and the present. But I am not interested in people moaning about the non-existance of the Hertford school. Nostalgia can be great, bitterness isn't. To reiterate, I am only stating the reasons why I rarely contribute.

I am not aware of bitterness that the Hertford School no longer exists, however where we may be bitter is that we were always the second class citizens. It has been very revealing to me to learn that the boys at Horsham were aware of our existence and were, in some case at least, curious about us. I think the forum has been cathartic for some people.

[sejintenej]

I am not aware of bitterness that the Hertford School no longer exists, however where we may be bitter is that we were always the second class citizens. It has been very revealing to me to learn that the boys at Horsham were aware of our existence and were, in some case at least, curious about us. I think the forum has been cathartic for some people.

As you write, Katharine, we certainly knew that there were 250 girls in a sister school at Hertford which bore the same name and, so far as we knew, was part of the same overall organisation.

Somewhere (and I think it was at Horsham) there are two statues - one of a "blue" boy and one of a girl in clothing of a similar period. I for one, assumed that the girl's school still wore the traditional garb. Of course there was no meeting and no contact of any type but in my days contact with the outside world was a "No, No". This was a broken (and it was a pretty earth shattering change in attitude) when a group of us were allowed to go to Horsham Fire Brigade HQ and be trained in their underground smoke bunker. Apart from necessary exchanges strictly on subject there was no other conversation - not even names!

WQe may be old fogies but I have to disagree with some of the posts. Youngsters can learn that "Tom Brown's Schooldays" was grounded in fact whilst dinosaurs like me can be glad that there has been some improvement in attitude. Perhaps there is a middle way which teaches discipline but is less authoritarian which could be better but ...........

As for lurkers, we have had a number of total outsiders (Sean for example), people with a future interest (Gemma in her earlier days), parents of possible future pupils and others - they have, I hope, been welcomed and treated initally with some politeness and later with absolute normality (ie we will extract as much urine from them as they extract from us) so lurkers should have no fear of putting a toe in the water; no sharks here.

[Mid A 15]

I am not aware of bitterness that the Hertford School no longer exists, however where we may be bitter is that we were always the second class citizens. It has been very revealing to me to learn that the boys at Horsham were aware of our existence and were, in some case at least, curious about us. I think the forum has been cathartic for some people.

As you write, Katharine, we certainly knew that there were 250 girls in a sister school at Hertford which bore the same name and, so far as we knew, was part of the same overall organisation.

Somewhere (and I think it was at Horsham) there are two statues - one of a "blue" boy and one of a girl in clothing of a similar period. I for one, assumed that the girl's school still wore the traditional garb. Of course there was no meeting and no contact of any type but in my days contact with the outside world was a "No, No". This was a broken (and it was a pretty earth shattering change in attitude) when a group of us were allowed to go to Horsham Fire Brigade HQ and be trained in their underground smoke bunker. Apart from necessary exchanges strictly on subject there was no other conversation - not even names!

WQe may be old fogies but I have to disagree with some of the posts. Youngsters can learn that "Tom Brown's Schooldays" was grounded in fact whilst dinosaurs like me can be glad that there has been some improvement in attitude. Perhaps there is a middle way which teaches discipline but is less authoritarian which could be better but ...........

As for lurkers, we have had a number of total outsiders (Sean for example), people with a future interest (Gemma in her earlier days), parents of possible future pupils and others - they have, I hope, been welcomed and treated initally with some politeness and later with absolute normality (ie we will extract as much urine from them as they extract from us) so lurkers should have no fear of putting a toe in the water; no sharks here.

Do you mean Shoz David?

Sean was in Mid B with RR I believe.

[midget]

I agree that any bitterness about Hertford is that there has almost been an attempt to "forget"about its existence. This may very well be due to staff changes over the years, rather than a deliberate attempt to consign us to oblivion.

Maggie

[JackD]

I will try to answer Phil's question as a person who posted 7 times since joining in Nov 2004. As has been noted 54 people have posted more than 100 times and they seemed to me to form a group that really chat with each other with a familiarity that is interesting to observe but hard to break into and sometimes quite unintelligible to the outsider.
I can't precisely remember but I do not think that any of my rare posts produced a response from these "club" members or anyone else which I do not mind but is not particularly encouraging.
I do however quite often find the topics interesting and really enjoy John Hopgood's great work and Housey and the Blue.
I left CH in 1948 and have lived outside the UK for all but 3 years since 1953 but still have a dozen or so friends from the school to whom I write (with a pen) several times a year. I have great affection for an institution that had a huge effect in forming my life.
I appreciate Julian's work enormously for the window it provides and loved the posts on echoes. Jack

[Ajarn Philip]

Thank you, Jack. And the more postings we get along these lines (just Jeeves and Jack so far) the more useful they become. Which country do you live in? And what's a"pen?"

[jhopgood]

I agree that any bitterness about Hertford is that there has almost been an attempt to "forget"about its existence. This may very well be due to staff changes over the years, rather than a deliberate attempt to consign us to oblivion.

Maggie

There was an article in a recent Old Blue by someone who went back to Hertford, and we publish reports on the regular meetings of Old 4's etc. In fact, I think the girls get together as groups rather more than Horsham Houses do.
We have also had items and photos of Hertford days, so although it is still a smaller percentage of the magazine than Horsham related events, it is still there, subject to suitable contributions being received.
Certainly as far as the Old Blue is concerned there has been no attempt to "forget"about its existence.
However, I would have trouble with a separate Hertford section, as I hope that that most of the content is of interest to most of the readers, rather than some of it to some of the readers.

[sejintenej]

I will try to answer Phil's question as a person who posted 7 times since joining in Nov 2004. As has been noted 54 people have posted more than 100 times and they seemed to me to form a group that really chat with each other with a familiarity that is interesting to observe but hard to break into and sometimes quite unintelligible to the outsider.
I can't precisely remember but I do not think that any of my rare posts produced a response from these "club" members or anyone else which I do not mind but is not particularly encouraging.

Hi, Jack

In answer to your comments above, when I see a new name I go to the profile which in your case gives no information at all. However, reading through your posts to date the real "you" starts to come out but, as you write, that is spread over nearly 3 years; a love of sport, a lifetime of flying (PPL or commercial doesn't come across), an appreciation that life in the Forties outside CH could / would have been far more difficult .....


Later edit/addition: there you are - a reply specifically to one of your posts and an obvious invitation for you to fill in some holes. Whether you do choose to fill the holes is totally up to you but nobody will press you for info which you don't want to give. Unfortunately a pen simply doesn't work on this medium and I can't find anywhere to sell me the ink to reply in pen in any case.

Fine so far. As for your posts there was nothing controversial - you gave straight answers to straight questions (the quality of leaving bible / prayer book for example, thoughts about Rock School .... ) which did not need answers or argument from the more argumentative of us. So be it. Seldom do my "run of the mill" posts provoke answers / ripostes either.

A relatively small group produce the vast majority of posts. IMHO this is "normal" in society; how often have you come across situations where everyone sees a need but everybody reckons that "somebody else" will do it / fill it? At present I have a daughter and son-in-law in the house together with their 3 children - every single one of them reckons that if they leave the dirty dishes on the table "somebody" will move them into the washing machine and turn it on. This is exactly what Julian and others have been writing about.
We are not a clique excluding others - just look how Gemma exploded on the scene - and she not even a pupil at the time. Shoz? well past school age, never been to CH, has no kids likely to go there and no real connection except an interest. Only through their putting stuff in their profile and constant posts do the rest of us get an impression of the person behind the moniker (though I have to admit that I simply cannot get on the post the info I would like - laziness I guess).
Jack; there's a place waiting at the table for you (and everyone else) ready for when you want to sit down and partake.

David Brown

[Angela Woodford]

I have met a few members from the forum. One example I was pleasantly surprised and the other meeting was frankly disappointing as their personality was nothing like their forum character.

However, back onto topic... I get the feeling that new posters/members may feel isolated by the clique of regular posters, not that this bothers me too much. I do not post regularly as very few topics take my interest, or I feel that I do not have anything to contribute to them. On the other hand, I don't mind reading these topics. I also do not want to get involved with the Hertford related articles as there seems to be a strong bitterness that the school no longer exists (not that I have anything against the people involved).

I wonder if those forum members liked you "Jeeves"? If few topics take your interest, you could always introduce something that does interest you?

I'm always delighted when male Old Blues are interested in our life at Hertford. I found the tone of your post unpleasantly condescending. Please, please don't get involved with "Hertford related articles"!

Angela Woodford

[Euterpe13]

David : your reply is perfect - thank you. Hopefully, you will encourage more of the "silent guests" to join in.

Angela : ouch ! pull your claws in, dear , you'll scare them off for good !

B.