Today's the day

This section was setup in August 2018 in order to move the existing related discussions from other sections into this new section to group them together, and separate from the other CH-related topics.

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DazedandConfused
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Re: Today's the day

Post by DazedandConfused » Fri Jul 13, 2018 3:46 pm

Great post Kerry and I absolutely agree. This will have changed many OB’s relationship with the school, it certainly has mine.

I have no concerns over Simon Reid or the current safeguarding at the school. What I do have are so many unanswered questions and the feeling that my happy memories of school are no longer valid. I can’t imagining visiting the school again, although I have been dreaming of my CH days every night since the trial started.
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Re: Today's the day

Post by KerryKidd » Fri Jul 13, 2018 4:15 pm

I’m wondering if one practical step could be taken now. For all the right reasons under usual circumstances, I know the BSB tends to ask beneficiaries to commit to doing something in return - giving atalk to the school about career choices, etc.
It feels to me that it would be wrong to expect that in these circumstances and with this generation there may always be issues with returning to the School.
I know someone on the forum is in touch with BSB and it might be good to point this out?
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Re: Today's the day

Post by J.R. » Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:01 pm

It's definitely a time to let the dust settle slightly. NOT for too long, though.

Richard and I have both been saying for some time, especially after today together. "There must be more to come out !!" The School trying to burying it will not work if and when more abused people with genuine complaints come forward.

Both Richard, Julian and myself want transparency from now on.

I won't go into 'Under the carpet sweeping' allegations until later.
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Re: Today's the day

Post by yamaha » Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:08 pm

Didn't the police press statement say their investigations went as far back as the 1940s?

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Re: Today's the day

Post by richardb » Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:32 pm

yamaha wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:08 pm
Didn't the police press statement say their investigations went as far back as the 1940s?
Yes it did.

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Re: Today's the day

Post by yamaha » Fri Jul 13, 2018 8:01 pm

The governor known as Old Man Wickers? ... Don't worry mods. He would be 120 by now.

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Re: Today's the day

Post by Andyjf » Fri Jul 13, 2018 8:19 pm

DazedandConfused wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 3:46 pm
Great post Kerry and I absolutely agree. This will have changed many OB’s relationship with the school, it certainly has mine.

I have no concerns over Simon Reid or the current safeguarding at the school. What I do have are so many unanswered questions and the feeling that my happy memories of school are no longer valid. I can’t imagining visiting the school again, although I have been dreaming of my CH days every night since the trial started.
That is exactly how I feel too.
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Re: Today's the day

Post by Janey Jam-Jar » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:12 am

DazedandConfused wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 3:46 pm
I can’t imagining visiting the school again, although I have been dreaming of my CH days every night since the trial started.
I visited only once a good few years ago now when you could just wander in outside term time. The sound, smell and sight of the place was very affecting. A massive, holiday-sized bottle of gin fell out the back of the car and smashed under the Octagon. Gutted. I don't think I'll ever go back. And not just because of the loss of the gin ... which was fairly traumatic.
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Re: Today's the day

Post by Molesworth 2 » Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:20 am

I saw a tiny end of the school (Peele) yesterday from a passing train. I’ve not been back for about 20 years. Even that small glimpse was unnerving. I have thought about the school a lot in the past few months. For many years I believed I mostly enjoyed my brief time at the school but looking back as an adult many things were considered acceptable that really should not have been.
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Re: Today's the day

Post by J.R. » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:49 pm

I have been back a few times since 1963. Things have changed beyond belief.

The atmosphere alone is totally different. In my day, the school was almost run on military lines.

I think the major change started after the departure of CME Seaman. There seemed to be a quick flurry of HM's after that, possibly with some hint of sweeping under the carpet rumour along the way.
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Re: Today's the day

Post by DazedandConfused » Sun Jul 15, 2018 7:45 pm

Molesworth 2 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:20 am
I saw a tiny end of the school (Peele) yesterday from a passing train. I’ve not been back for about 20 years. Even that small glimpse was unnerving. I have thought about the school a lot in the past few months. For many years I believed I mostly enjoyed my brief time at the school but looking back as an adult many things were considered acceptable that really should not have been.
Yes! Until recently if anyone asked about my time at the school I’d have answered without hesitation that I LOVED my years there, it is an amazing school etc etc.

With hindsight, my horrendous relationship with food stems from my CH years (1 piece of fruit per week and very little in the way of fresh vegetables, surviving on toast and feeling hungry most of the time), the fear of the senior girls, having an empty bin put over your head and then hit with hockey sticks.... that wasn’t ok. The constant, low level bullying is the reason I will always be anonymous on this forum as I am terrified that certain OBs would be reading my posts and mocking me.

Previously I had felt the staff’s approach to be a sort of benign neglect, like hands-off middle class parents who let their children get on with it. I felt lucky that our house mistress wasn’t more involved in our lives and had little idea what we were up to. With hindsight, that wasn’t ok either.
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Re: Today's the day

Post by Andyjf » Sun Jul 15, 2018 8:48 pm

DazedandConfused wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 7:45 pm
Molesworth 2 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:20 am
I saw a tiny end of the school (Peele) yesterday from a passing train. I’ve not been back for about 20 years. Even that small glimpse was unnerving. I have thought about the school a lot in the past few months. For many years I believed I mostly enjoyed my brief time at the school but looking back as an adult many things were considered acceptable that really should not have been.
Yes! Until recently if anyone asked about my time at the school I’d have answered without hesitation that I LOVED my years there, it is an amazing school etc etc.

With hindsight, my horrendous relationship with food stems from my CH years (1 piece of fruit per week and very little in the way of fresh vegetables, surviving on toast and feeling hungry most of the time), the fear of the senior girls, having an empty bin put over your head and then hit with hockey sticks.... that wasn’t ok. The constant, low level bullying is the reason I will always be anonymous on this forum as I am terrified that certain OBs would be reading my posts and mocking me.

Previously I had felt the staff’s approach to be a sort of benign neglect, like hands-off middle class parents who let their children get on with it. I felt lucky that our house mistress wasn’t more involved in our lives and had little idea what we were up to. With hindsight, that wasn’t ok either.
I really relate to this too. Certainly my experience in the 90s
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DazedandConfused
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Re: Today's the day

Post by DazedandConfused » Sun Jul 15, 2018 9:24 pm

Andyjf wrote:
I really relate to this too. Certainly my experience in the 90s
I was 90s too, early to mid. I imagine there are many of us from that period who feel the same, even if we thought we were the only ones at the time.
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Re: Today's the day

Post by rockfreak » Sun Jul 15, 2018 9:37 pm

Good old Simon! What a spiffing chap he is! The trouble is that all the spiffing chaps in the world have not been able to entirely prevent abuse which was there when I was there in the 1950s (when, interestingly, it took a shorter time to emerge - although some might have said too long) and is still going on in the modern age (or is that the postmodern age as trendy academics tend to call it?) when it took a bleddy eternity to emerge. As long as you have hermetically sealed institutions out there in the countryside with a culture of their own you'll have predators. And as long as you have this culture you'll lull impressionable young ladies into thinking that this is normal practice when the sports coach massages them half-naked on his study floor with the door locked. Why do they think that brothels are quaintly titled massage parlours?
Once again, just for once, I find myself agreeing with Banker Brown. The school teaches life skills? Geddaway! My three daughters who went to state schools would have sussed out the lecherous Karim on day one and come home with the news. Close these bleddy outdated boarding schools down!
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Re: Today's the day

Post by richardb » Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:18 pm

I am the same as Molesworth 2.

I haven't been back since 1979 and rarely thought about the school. Now it pervades my thoughts an awful lot.

I now have a very vivid image that keeps recurring of a master standing over me at the side of the bed as I awoke. Initially I thought it was at the senior end but now it appears to be Webb. I can't say that I was ever abused so it won't change my life but it does leave me thinking that I was one of many who had a lucky escape.

I can only speak for the 70s but I now realise that the school was emotionally bankrupt and actually a lonely place.
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