Helpful Tips for New Parents please!!!

[lonelymom]

It used to say on the 'About Money' leaflet that every child would require a dictionary and a bible. My daughter started CH with both - the dictionary has been used, the bible hasn't even been opened! So, to save parents spending more money than is absolutely necessary I would say yes, get him a smallish dictionary (limited space on desk) and don't get a bible unless someone tells you it is absolutely necessary!

[YadaYada]

Thank you - really appreciate it.
Just want to get it right for him!

[anniexf]

Just thought you might be amused by the list my parents got (1955). The first 3 items are:

Holy Bible - Authorised Version (Large Print)
The Book of Common Prayer
Songs of Praise (new and enlarged edition)

Same school (essentially), very different priorities!!

[YadaYada]

Do we need to take hangers for the wardrobe or will there be some there?

Thank you!

[huggermugger]

Been thinking about this. My best all-time tip is...

Stay Cheerful

- particularly when you're on the phone to your DS or DD. I don't mean wilfully ignoring obvious unhappiness but whatever you do, don't weep down the phone or go over the top on the "missing you" stakes. I'll never forget the very first time we visted CH. The policy at the time was apparently no phone contact between child and parent for the first term. Can't see how that was enforced tbh, but we got into a discussion about it with various pupils. They said that they thought it was pretty harsh and that it was likely to change fairly soon (as it obviously did). However, they thought that the main reason for the ban was that parents (oh alright then - mothers) howled down the phone and seriously unsettled the kids.

This may well have been an exaggeration but I don't think we should underestimate the extent to which kids worry about us and/or the effect our own moods can have on our kids.

Having said all that, it's a fine balance. As I found out here when my DS started & I poured my heart out here, if our act is too good, it can make the children believe that we are having a fantasic time without them and don't miss them at all. (Some OB's said it had never occured to them taht they were missed as their parents kept resolutely stiff upper lips...)

My recommendation is comments along the lines of "I really miss you but I know you're in the right place" or "I really miss you but it's only another 2 weeks to go " . That, and lots of letters/postcards. I didn't get any back (despite sending him with plenty of stamped addressed ones to send to me) but I know he appreciated them because he kept them for ages. Ask friends and family to send encouraging messages as well. My Mum has been fairly absent in the grandparenting stakes but she regularly sends postcards and little parcels and my DS really appreciates them.

[huggermugger]

YadaYada - My advice is to take some. We were issued with some in the second year but they went "missing" fairly quickly.

[huggermugger]

One thing you should know is that things do vary from House to House. They do tend to operate semi-autonomously and often have different practices & traditions which is good on one level I suppose. They are supposed to be like families and all families tend to have their own rules. But it makes it a bit difficult to work out what to expect. So don't be surpised if things vary a bit.

[YadaYada]

Thanks for all the advice!

Certainly agree that it is going to be harder for me than for him and am very much looking forward to the first leave weekend already!

[huggermugger]

We all count the days until the first leave weekend, even when they're in their third year.... but good luck, hope your DS settles in OK and keep us posted! This forum was a lifeline for me in the early days.

[YadaYada]

Safety pins!

Is too late for us now but in case there are new parents for next year reading this.......we could really have done with some safety pins to help hold up his breeches....even after going back to Wardrobe to get a smaller pair I think safety pins would have been useful.

[lonelymom]

Coat hangers. I had some because I took my daughter's kit on hangers, but I heard two sets of parents asking if there were any anywhere. I'm sure, in the past, I've found the odd coathanger in the wardrobes, but apparently this year there were none.

[YadaYada]

I'll second that on the hanger front. I did take some and he did have some in his wardrobe but the boy in the next bed didnt have any in his wardrobe and hadnt bought any. Obviously we shared them out but would have been tricky if neither of us had bought some. 99p for 10 at ASDA!

[englishangel]

[quote="YadaYada"]I'll second that on the hanger front. I did take some and he did have some in his wardrobe but the boy in the next bed didnt have any in his wardrobe and hadnt bought any. Obviously we shared them out but would have been tricky if neither of us had bought some. 99p for 10 at ASDA![/quote]

Now THAT is a useful tip. I think IKEA's are good and cheap too, but obviously not as widespread as ASDA

[onewestguncopse]

It used to say on the 'About Money' leaflet that every child would require a dictionary and a bible. My daughter started CH with both - the dictionary has been used, the bible hasn't even been opened! So, to save parents spending more money than is absolutely necessary I would say yes, get him a smallish dictionary (limited space on desk) and don't get a bible unless someone tells you it is absolutely necessary!

Good advice. In reality, the three items that seem to be a pre-requisite these days are a mobile phone, nintendo DS and an ipod!

Some of the school information is dated

By the way, DO NOT get a mobile phone on contract. PAYG or face a BIG bill.

[wickedwitch]

This has all been fascinating and very useful. Please do keep us updated with stuff. We now have a list of things to pack that werent on the original sheet!

witchy and Jugglinbob.