Dodgy hygiene practices

[J.R.]

I just had to share this effort from today's Grauniad:

"Over the years, advertisers of sanitary protection have tried, repeatedly, to convince us that a woman's period is a glorious time. A hallowed time. A time to ice skate, bungee jump and rollerblade. A time to leak blue liquid and listen to soft rock. And a time when we feel compelled to wear our tightest, whitest shorts."

"Dodgy Hygiene Practices" seemed the only place.

Hmmmm !

[englishangel]

Not sure if I have ever mentioned this but my daughter (being a tall girl though not 'big') had had the paraphenalia in her school bag since primary school. At 13 and a half she still hadn't started and was going to ireland for 2 weeks with her Dad and brother so I thought an updating chat was called for. I was sitting in the bath (I thought that was a very unthreatening of me) and she was sitting on the loo in a midriff baring top and skin-tight cycle shorts (navy bluethough not white) and I said
"Sod's law dictates that you will start your periods while you are in Ireland with your Dad, better take a pack of pads."
"Too late" she said.
"When?" I said.
"The day before yesterday "

[Angela Woodford]

Hmmmm !

It is a strange and wonderful thing to have caused JR to blush. Sorry, dear heart.

Although today's advertising of such products does seem a bit hilarious at times (see above) we must welcome the frank and open approach of modern girls (see above). I could never have voluntarily initiated a discussion about menstruation with my mother. Never! She did sort of explain the process to me before I left for school. We could barely look at each other for embarassment. At least I did vaguely begin to understand those ads for "Tampax - for all-day freshness and freedom!" that had begun to appear in Readers' Digest. The ad showed a female in a pull on rubber-flowered swimming hat rejoicing waist-deep in a pool, and I had supposed it to be promoting some sort of cologne or deodorant.

My mother had bought for me a packet of hideous bulky pads in a plain brown wrapper, and a horrid elastic belt thing. She admitted that when she was young, they had made their own out of rags which had to be washed and reused. This made the whole business seem even more repulsive - oh how disgusting! - and, after a couple of pad-free years had gone by at CH and my friends had started, the prospect of the incinerator, the bin and the brown paper bags down the end hung over me like some hideous gynaecological guillotine.

This is where I was so grateful to Jasmin Ansar, my brainy Pakistani friend, who described for me what to expect one rainy afternoon in Wardrobe Room. We were hunkered up on top of those huge drawers in which the sets of vests were kept. Jasmin had started early, and kindly clarified many issues for me. I appreciated her frankness.

However, I wasn't to begin periods until I was fifteen. My system always reacted to stress and anxiety with amenorrhoea, so I was troubled very little during my schooldays!

So, no chance of leaking blue fluids whilst listening to soft rock in tight white shorts as my daughters were to do!

[englishangel]

Hmmmm !

It is a strange and wonderful thing to have caused JR to blush. Sorry, dear heart.

It serves him right, does he have memories of Hertford?

[J.R.]

Hmmmm !

It is a strange and wonderful thing to have caused JR to blush. Sorry, dear heart.

T'would hardly make me blush, Angela.

I may have gone to an the male boarding-school of its day, but, I have sired two daughters, two grand-daughters, (+ one grand-son). There is absolutely no subject taboo in our family.

In fact, middle grand-daughter is staying with us tonight, just coz she fancies an evenings break from her Mum !!

(We MUST be doing something right !)

[CHAZ]

Hmmmm !

It is a strange and wonderful thing to have caused JR to blush. Sorry, dear heart.

T'would hardly make me blush, Angela.

I may have gone to an the male boarding-school of its day, but, I have produced two daughters, who have given Jan and I two grand-daughters, (+ one grand-son).

There is absolutely no subject taboo in our family.

In fact, middle grand-daughter is staying with us tonight, just coz she fancies an evenings break from her Mum !!

(We MUST be doing something right !)

If I understand the verb correctly, then this could be badly construed J.R. !!!! Maybe a little editing needed to read "who had two daughters"

[J.R.]

I may have gone to an the male boarding-school of its day, but, I have produced two daughters, who have given Jan and I two grand-daughters, (+ one grand-son).

There is absolutely no subject taboo in our family.

In fact, middle grand-daughter is staying with us tonight, just coz she fancies an evenings break from her Mum !!

(We MUST be doing something right !)

Hurried typing. Does this look better Chaz ?

[Fjgrogan]

Now I am going to get really pedantic and annoy JR, who is already in a bad mood - so sorry in advance JR! Surely that should be 'given Jan and me ........' and I am intrigued to know how there can be a middle grand-daughter of two? Anyway, have a really good evening - every youngster needs someone they can go to to get away from Mum! I remember telling a friend of Maria's during their Hertford schooldays that if she really wanted to run away from home she was welcome to come to us, but the first thing I would do would be phone her mother to let her know that her daughter was safe and stop her worrying. She never did it!

[Jo]

Now I am going to get really pedantic and annoy JR, who is already in a bad mood - so sorry in advance JR! Surely that should be 'given Jan and me ........' and I am intrigued to know how there can be a middle grand-daughter of two? Anyway, have a really good evening - every youngster needs someone they can go to to get away from Mum! I remember telling a friend of Maria's during their Hertford schooldays that if she really wanted to run away from home she was welcome to come to us, but the first thing I would do would be phone her mother to let her know that her daughter was safe and stop her worrying. She never did it!

YES!!!!!. You beat me to it!

[J.R.]

B0llocks ! - I'm having another pint.

Eldest and youngest grand-daughters are staying the night and we are watching Michael Jackson's memorial service.

MICHAEL JACKSON R.I.P. (At last ) !

[kerrensimmonds]

Now I am very CONFUSED. I thought it was the 'middle' granddaughter.....Maybe it was the extra pint that produced one either side?
Off to lie down in a darkened room (again). Stuff the Michael Jackson extravaganza (apologies to afficionados)

[J.R.]

RIGHT.....

Zara... Eldest

Sharna.... Next

Amber..... Next

Eddie... Favourite Grand-Son.

[kerrensimmonds]

So should we ask you to be specific about which two you have tonight? And I presume the favourite grandson is in a pool of one.....

[Angela Woodford]

"JR Family" thread needed?

[sejintenej]

RIGHT.....

Zara... Eldest

Sharna.... Next

Amber..... Next

Eddie... Favourite Grand-Son.

Isn't that a bit OTT when Zara, Sharna and Amber shouldn't be competition for him!