Over on Facebook

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Over on Facebook

Post by richardb » Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:01 pm

Someone has posted that Husband ran off with a 15 year old.

We know that can't be true. But it did get me wondering.

Was the 17 year old that Husband was caught having a "consensual affair" disciplined, eg asked to leave?

If she was treated as anything other than a victim then it shows just how much in the dark ages the school was.

Husband was 44. Not only should he have known better, he was required to exercise self control. He was the one at fault, not the girl whose life he damaged.

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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by DazedandConfused » Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:14 pm

No, she stayed on until her Grecians, she was in my boarding house. Unless there was more than one!

She did get a lot of flack for the affair, particularly from his sons.

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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by richardb » Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:15 pm

That's a relief. She was a victim too.

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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by DazedandConfused » Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:18 pm

Absolutely and I thought it was very generous of the victim who posted on here to acknowledge that too. She was (and mostly likely still is!) a lovely person who was treated badly by fellow pupils once it became public knowledge. Whether she was punished in any way by staff I don’t know, but she certainly didn’t leave the school over it.

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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by DazedandConfused » Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:22 pm

Looking at the Facebook post I think the poster is confusing Husband’s ‘consensual’ affair with Jerry Martin who ran off with (and I believed eventually married) a pupil.

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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by richardb » Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:24 pm

So there was another one?

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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by DazedandConfused » Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:48 pm

richardb wrote:
Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:24 pm
So there was another one?
Husband had a consensual affair which became public and resulted in his dismissal (although I take issue with the definition of consensual here).

Jerry Martin was the bandmaster after David Elliott retired. He was married with two young children and ran away with a Dep, or possibly a Grecian. She posted on Friends Reunited when the site was popular that they had married although separated a few years later.
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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by J.R. » Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:51 pm

richardb wrote:
Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:24 pm
So there was another one?

Does that then class it as epidemic or pandemic ?? :oops:
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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by richardb » Sun Jul 22, 2018 2:51 pm

Staff should NEVER get involved with pupils.

At CH they knew that if they did it and they were caught, it would mean no more than being moved on.
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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by DazedandConfused » Sun Jul 22, 2018 2:54 pm

Jerry Martin’s affair was very obvious to anyone who cared to notice, but nothing was done.

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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by LHA » Sun Jul 22, 2018 3:03 pm

The guy who ran the 1990 Old Blues facebook site has closed it down, as he 'wanted happy memories'. In doing this, he, to me, is actually complicit in preventing people who may have been complicit in abuse coming forward to the police.
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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by J.R. » Sun Jul 22, 2018 3:26 pm

It's getting more and more interesting by the minute.
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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by Fertii » Sun Jul 22, 2018 6:38 pm

LHA wrote:
Sun Jul 22, 2018 3:03 pm
The guy who ran the 1990 Old Blues facebook site has closed it down, as he 'wanted happy memories'. In doing this, he, to me, is actually complicit in preventing people who may have been complicit in abuse coming forward to the police.
Don't be ridiculous. Of course he isn't complicit in anything, especially as he was a grecian in 1990 - at the peak of when this was all going on. He simply didn't want the page open when all this is going on as people want to talk about their experiences at CH when they should be talking to the police....
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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by LHA » Sun Jul 22, 2018 8:20 pm

Fertii wrote:
Sun Jul 22, 2018 6:38 pm
LHA wrote:
Sun Jul 22, 2018 3:03 pm
The guy who ran the 1990 Old Blues facebook site has closed it down, as he 'wanted happy memories'. In doing this, he, to me, is actually complicit in preventing people who may have been complicit in abuse coming forward to the police.
Don't be ridiculous. Of course he isn't complicit in anything, especially as he was a grecian in 1990 - at the peak of when this was all going on. He simply didn't want the page open when all this is going on as people want to talk about their experiences at CH when they should be talking to the police....
Hang on.....what does he regard as being more important. Sharing memories about say....cricket.....or people coming forward to report abuse? Days after the Dobbie/Husband verdicts that's what he was posting about (or something similar). I know lots of people enjoy positive memories of their school days like that (many don't, many have moving on, but far enough I suppose if that's what floats your boat) but it was incredibly crass. Bob Sillett hasn't commented on his obvious failings as an SMT member in the era of abuse, and days later his adult son is banging on with cricket anecdotes or similar. I'm surprised his criminal sister didn't join in as well. He stopped anyone commenting on the stories, yet, as we know, it's enabling people to talk and come forward that enables people to be brought to justice. Facebook's one of the biggest websites in the world and the page owner isn't liable or otherwise for the contents. He just seemed disinterested in the issue and wanted it to go away, the only remaining Facebook site with a critical mass of members is full of ex teachers from the era....and this....so long may this little forum continue (hat tip Julian)

Perhaps it's just clumsy phrasing on your part but to say people 'should' be speaking to the Police is offensive, and like the owner of the 1990 you just display an apparent ignorance of mechanisms of abuse. If it was that easy to go to the Police - as you are so happy to say people - "should " then then the offenders would have been convicted the first time round in each case, rather than the school effectively exist as paedophile hosting organisation for decades.

Again, some of the moderators on the OB facebook page really disgust me, I recall specifically one person talking about 'alleged' offences after people had been convicted. They only reason they gave to censor postings was to 'avoid the victims being upset'. We know already that the victims are so of the strongest people you will ever care to think about, an have endured public court cases and cross examination by the barristers acting for the convicted sex offenders. They (the moderators/censors) should hang their heads in shame.

Why wouldn't he 'want the page open with all this going on'. Is it more interested in abuse being identified and punished. Or the opposite. Don't forget the school could have got the ball rolling much earlier by publishing Webb's first sentence of imprisonment in 2015.
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Re: Over on Facebook

Post by Scazza » Sun Jul 22, 2018 8:55 pm

LHA wrote:
Sun Jul 22, 2018 3:03 pm
The guy who ran the 1990 Old Blues facebook site has closed it down, as he 'wanted happy memories'. In doing this, he, to me, is actually complicit in preventing people who may have been complicit in abuse coming forward to the police.
That's maybe a bit strong but we certainly all need to have a sensible adult conversation and people closing doors to that are at best being naive, as is the 'talk to the hand' from the school.

This doesn't get resolved through more secrecy, denial, or ignorance. Any of those things still exist and abuse will find fertile ground again irrespective of the recent expensive safeguarding audits.

I dont do Facebook so grateful for the updates. Thanks to Julian for walking a very conscientious path here. Can't beat independence - people talked of mobilising CHOBA but CH killed the old forums just before Karims conviction. I imagine the new iteration is even more carefully owned and moderated by the school now.

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